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Quintessential Thought

We’re in a series to help you and your teams find actionable steps in complexity by finding small steps that are in our control and making requests for things outside of our control.

This week, we're tackling acceptance – accepting things that you can't control. It might sound odd when you're itching to find actionable steps. Why look at what you can't change, right?

Here's the thing: If you cling to an impossible action, you're keeping yourself focused away from finding good options you can tackle. You're basically wasting energy on dead ends. The only way to shift your focus is to change your perspective by letting the unfeasible thing go.

Imagine you’re stuck in traffic and stressing about a late meeting. Been there!  But stressing won't magically bend the traffic jam. Instead, accepting what's outside your control (the traffic) frees you up to take action (like calling the person you’re meeting with or starting the meeting on the phone). It's like we talked about earlier – letting go of what you can't change opens the door to what you can do.

This isn't about throwing in the towel on difficult goals. It's about acknowledging the current limits and constraints that aren’t helpful for you to focus on right now. By seeing them clearly and intentionally setting them aside, you'll free up valuable mental space to take on some awesome (and effective) actions.

Quotes

“The only thing you sometimes have control over is perspective. You don't have control over your situation. But you have a choice about how you view it.” – Chris Pine

“The first step toward change is awareness. The second step is acceptance.” – Nathaniel Branden

“A lot of things are going to happen that you can't necessarily control all the time, but you can control what you do after it happens.” – Lonzo Ball

Quick Step

Consider the most important challenge to your team or product. Identify one thing about that challenge that you’re trying to impact, but it’s outside your control or influence, and decide to let it go for right now.

Question

When have you spent time on a constraint or obstacle that you couldn’t control? What did it cost you?

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